The Feast of Athena

Okay, kitty cats, here is how this is going to go down. I’m adding these goddess feasts to the site with a very particular format. This first one is on the house because its for my girl, Athena, and I want everyone to raise a glass. But also, I want to test drive this new format and see how it goes for everyone. Probably by May, these will become downloadable in magazine format, accessed through the shop. I will put up some of what the month’s goddess features and then you can choose to go on, or not. Eventually, the whole series will show up in book format. So stay tuned there. Until then….here we go, read through, or click here to check out the download

When I was quite young, my mother had this small brass ring. It was a pinky ring to her and fit loosely around my thumb at the time. I loved that ring. My father hated it. My stepfather hated it. I think she kept it simply because they did.

The fact that she even owned it was ballsy at the time. Today, we wouldn't think much of it, but in 1980 that little ring really said something. It said "BITCH". Carved out of metal, not simply engraved in it. In big, block letters, in bold brass, this ring proclaimed loud and proud that this woman was a BITCH. Man, I fucking loved that ring.

Back then, they called you a bitch when you failed to perform conventional femininity. When you didn't smile. When you didn't go along. But mostly when you demonstrated that you didn't need men to solve/manage/handle your life. If you took care of yourself, handled your finances, said no when you meant it, and basically stood up for yourself, you were a bitch.

If you fit any of these profiles, welcome to bitch-hood, ladies. I've been a bitch since 1988. How about you? As a patron to bitches all around the Western world, I would very much like to introduce you to one of the original bitches, Ms. Pallas Athena.

Athena is such a fabulous bitch that she is the goddess of both war and wisdom; the lady literally knows both how and when to fight. That's control. She rolls with both the owl and the serpent, showing us how to work with the shadow from both high and low to remove fear. That's power. She teaches both weaving and sovereignty, or, in other words, how to take care of your own damn self. Women across time have used this archetype of the self-sufficient woman to manage a world in which they were not allowed to exist in fullness.

She taught them how to be strategic in the wielding of the correct weapon at the correct time. Or better said, how to be a bitch when bitch-hood wasn't safe.

One of the things to note is that Athena maintains both her masculine and feminine is absolute equality. She is woman, but she did not come through woman. Athena springs fully formed from the head of Zeus; she came through man. She can access the masculine way of being without feeling at all as if she has compromised her feminine nature. And there is nobody who dares to suggest that there is another way she should be.

She is never considered less of a woman simply because she is fully connected to her masculine. I invite you to think of all the times you had to stuff that power down because somebody told you it made you to "butch". What they meant to say was "bitch", thank you very much. I truly hope you didn't let the opinion of a lesser mortal shrink you down; Athena never did.

Athena is fearsome because she is fully integrated. There is no separation or inner conflict, and therefore, no chaos. She has complete access to her divinity because she is not partitioned away from any part of it. Inner alignment, birthed from divine connection, gives one the wisdom to act through the truth of your core, the truth of who you are in your completeness. All wise action flows from this clarity that will never need to prove itself through unnecessary force, or unnecessary passivity.

The one who accepts the integrated self stands against situations that promote separation, chaos or diminishment. But they also inherently understand that there are times to fight, but also times to observe. Advancing is equally important as holding ground, and if the warrior within does not cultivate discernment, then wisdom is lost and chaotic conflict ensues. The shadow advances. Separation ensues. Integration is lost. The ability to decipher when the correct time to act is discernment, sometimes also called wisdom.

To be the wise warrior is to understand the nature of conflict, what brings it, what it actually means and when it is necessary. Conflict is always a result of separation and a denial of the divinity that animates us all. In its heart, this type of integrated warrior is one who can see the many connections inherent in each action, and the ripples that take effect from each decision made.

That is a lot to ask, which is why Athena presents us with companions for this task. She gives animal totems to her followers, which speak right into the most animalistic parts of our humanity.

Athena's owl medicine deals with the heart of our shadow, the fear that hides in the dark. Access to integrated wisdom is almost always blocked by our own fear, which takes so many shapes. Fear of the other. Fear of being seen. Fear of being small. Fear is a weapon of the mind, often thrust outward onto others, but equally often thrust within. The shame is that we accept this before we are able to understand the truth. Then, living inside this fear, we spin up inside the emotion of fear before there is space to deny its reality. This self-fulfilling loop from mind to heart back to mind is something that is routinely manipulated by those who seek to keep others compliant.

The owl injects sight into those spaces. It symbolizes seeing through the darkness, perceiving your hidden fears, and accessing the truth that must be pulled to the light. Darkness has its place inside our psyches; it has value. Seeing and acknowledging it without being drawn down into it wholesale is the lesson of the owl. This is witness consciousness at its most primal inflection.

The chaos of being human--uncertainty, doubt, greed, fear, hatred, shame-- it all exists in this shadow and being able to see it with primal witness consciousness is a greatly underestimated power. Wisdom will never come to you if you don't learn to see, pinpoint the actor of separation and swoop into the dark to nip it from the ground before it causes harm. This is integration from the high mind and higher consciousness.

But Athena also offers us the same opportunity from the base, from the lower self, from the serpent. The owl, with it's far sight can only witness and act from air--or the mind. But the serpent acts from earth, through the body wisdom. It performs the same function as the owl, only it has the ability to do so through physical transmutation.

The serpent an ancient protector totem and a powerful symbol of how we use the physical to transform. Remember, everything in life happens through the physical, so we cannot discount the value of our physical responses to fearful stimuli. The serpent is an adept in the earth. It travels through its darkness and depths. Everything that the owl sees from above, the serpent sees from eye level and still manages to act swiftly and cleanly.

The serpent ingests that which is found in the dark and uses it to literally transform itself. It eats the fear and uses it to become something else. When the darkness is cleared, we can see who we are and what we need to shed in order to embody our divine self. Once that is done, there is truly no system that can claim sovereignty over you. You are complete unto yourself with a clear vision that enables you to access wisdom, power and connection.

So that loops us back to the bitch. In the ancient world, they used to word "virgin" to describe this type of sovereign woman. This did not at all mean a woman of sexual "purity" as it came to be known in the Judaeo-Christian complex. What it meant was a woman contained unto herself with no partner who saw to her maintenance; a woman to took care of herself and her own way. Today they might just call you a bitch.

So don't get me wrong. There are tons of stories where Athena appears really, really mean. More than a bitch as we are coming to use that term. But I would like to posit that what we are being sold is a transition problem. In an evolving world of increasingly male-centered vision where women need to be set against one another to ensure masculine rule, it makes sense that this goddess goes from virgin to bitch as time moves along. It is an effort to create separation.

Take for instance the tale of Medusa. A beautiful maiden, a priestess in Athena's temple, who was assaulted and raped by Poseidon. The story is that she turned Medusa from a maiden to a gorgon as punishment for being assaulted. The common narrative is that this female goddess of wisdom turned on one of her own for the crime of being assaulted, which just does not track. Maybe, if you think about it from a male de-centered viewpoint, she may have done a traumatized Medusa a service. Her hair now a weaving mass of serpents, she could turn any man into stone, making it absolutely certain that she would never be sexually traumatized by any man ever again. Medusa was transformed, the power of the serpent embodied. She was elevated and freed from men's base desires.

Furthermore, when Perseus killed her and gifted her head to Athena, it was made into her personal aegis. She used the power of a woman's transformed rage as a source of great protection.

Lets look at Arachne. This tale is always told as one of petty jealousy where Athena loses a weaving contest with a young woman and instead of accepting graciously, turns her into a spider as punishment. But we have to ask again if this was the actual motivation, once we account for her role as the avatar of wisdom. Yes, there is a parable aspect to this tale, cautioning humans against arrogance and hubris against the gods. That tracks. Jealousy from this goddess does not. Arachne is turned into a spider, which is a useful and valuable being who weaves extraordinarily beautiful designs as an expression of her nature. It could be said that she was elevated into the highest expression of her talent. She could not become a god--but in this aspect, she was raised damn close.

Go further into the tale of her son, Erichthonius. Hephaestus attempted to rape her (what is it with these guys?) and she kicked his ass. This, oddly, excited him enough to basically hump her leg to completion, spilling himself all over the ground. From this seed and the fertility of the earth sprung Erichthonius, who she took as her son. She did not have to; he was not of her body. But she did and she protected him with a serpent, of course, causing some myths to describe him as half man, half snake. He became the first myth king of Athens and is credited with teaching them yoke horses, drive chariots, till with a plow and smelt metal. Good guy, a perfect king for the patriarchy that was evolving.

Athena-like. Only with a penis.

He was born much the way she was, a male version of parthogenic birth that did not need to pass through woman. She was born complete through the divine masculine (Zeus); he was born complete through divine feminine (Gaia). Together, integrated as one, they elevated the great city of Athens and all of its citizens.

Taken all together, the through theme is one of bringing out the best self through integrated action and absence of fear. The darkness represents the initiatory circumstance and its emotional load, the wisdom shows in the end solution and its absence of emotional toil. The wise warrior's discernment is such that very little emotional suffering occurs over what action to take. Looked at through a base human lens, this can read as simple hubris. But when regarded through a higher lens of divine self, it shows her integration more clearly. The onus is on us to get over our cultural pearl clutching that she acted in accordance with her own compass.

Athena knows who she is and what she is doing. She has transcended the shadow to have this wisdom available to her. She acts upon this wisdom through a self integrated with her divine nature. If this makes her a bitch to some, well, that's a human perception problem, isn't it?

When her world fully slipped to patriarchy and her stories became shaded with it, her power did not dim. She did not succumb to the fate of so many powerful goddess and get slapped with the role of "wife". Her role as an integrated soul, both masculine and feminine embodied equally, allowed her to rise into the role of teacher. She guided and led. She pointed the way and provided both insight and skill. Her weaving became the functional art of women. Her strategic nature became the council of husbandry and household management. Her serpent became the mouser in the larder that kept your stores safe for winter and her owl kept the field free of pests so your crop was viable.

Her wisdom became the wisdom of salt. As the goddess of women's practical wisdom and ability, she taught cities how to grow, communities how to endure, and individuals how to see long-view solutions. This is a different kind of battle for the warrior--the war of everyday survival--and it is quite possibly the greater task

So when we approach this goddess, the great bitch that she is, we have to do so with long memory. She has been many things, and painted with many brushes. You have access to all of them, and she will answer to them wholesale. Warrior, sage, weaver, teacher, mother, sovereign, owl, serpent, feminist and all around divine bad ass. Whatever you need, she has.

All you have to do is ask.

The Feast

March—Aries—Athena

Greek Cottage Loaf

Whipped Feta with Olive Oil, Pine Nuts & Parsley

Olives in Oil

White Bean Salad with Cucumber, celery, parsley, paprika

and pickled red onion in Lemon Vinaigrette

Roasted Branzino (Bass) with Mustard, lemon & Roasted Garlic

“Baklava” Owl with Pistachios, Walnuts and Hazelnuts in a Spiced Honey Sauce

Queen of Spades card

Blue, white & gold

Dragon's blood, frankincense, cedarwood

Lapis & Ruby

Greek Cottage Loaf

This bread is a hearty loaf that toasts and dips well. I especially love it with garlic oil.

In your mixer or a large bowl, blend:

4 c flour

½ c semolina (can be omitted, just make up the difference with flour)

2 t salt

In a small bowl, mix:

1 1/2c warm water

1 T sugar

2 T yeast

Allow the yeast to bloom until fluffy and foamy, roughly 5-10 minutes. Create a small divet in the dry, mixed ingredients and then add the foamy yeast mix all at once. When the yeast is mostly integrated, slowly add in:

1/4c milk

¼c melted butter

Blend well until a sticky dough forms. Turn out onto a lightly floured counter and hand knead for at least 5 minutes, or until the dough begins to resist slightly. That bitch will stay a little tacky; don't try to resist that. Shape into a ball and place into an oiled bowl and allow to rise for 60 minutes in your oven with only the light on. This helps create soft warmth. Cover the bowl with a dishtowel.

About 10 minutes before the first rise is complete, mix in a shallow bowl:

3 T sesame seeds

1 T Za’atar

1 T Sumac *optional

1 T warm water

This will allow the seeds to soften and make them adhere to the loaf more easily. When the dough has doubled, roll the dough out of the bowl so it deflates a bit. Then either roll it into a ball or stretch it into an envelope shape. Either works. Dip both sides of the dough in the seed mixture and then place on a parchment lined baking sheet. Allow the loaf to rise for another 60 minutes.

Preheat oven to 425, then bake for 30 minutes or until golden and thumps hollow when you tap the bottom. Let cool on a rack and serve warm.

Whipped Feta with Olive Oil, Pine Nuts & Parsley

This is a quick and easy starter that goes amazingly well with your warm cottage loaf. Store bought feta and yoghurt make this a quick dish, but if you want to go for deep scratch the recipes for both are in the Deep Scratch Index.

In a food processor, blend until creamy:

8 oz feta*

¾ c greek yoghurt*

1 T lemon juice

Scoop into a bowl and top with olive oil, parsley and a sprinkling of pine nuts.

Roasted Bass served with White Bean Salad

Here’s the story, Morning Glory. As I learned while researching this dish, the peeps of the Mediterranean use Branzino for a lot of fish dishes. Branzino is a “true Bass”, where the things we buy on this side of the pond that are labeled as “Bass” are often some form of Cod or Grouper. Don’t ask me why, no clue. But I’ve used both Black Bass (Grouper, apparently) and Sea Bass (Toothfish), and both have done very, very well.

So I guess what I’m saying is to grab a fish that is white, flaky and fantastic and all will be well. Just keep an eye to the cook time.

In a small ramekin, create a paste of:

3 T whole mustard

4 cloves roasted garlic*

1 T oregano

2 t salt

zest of 1 lemon, or a splash of lemon juice

Rinse your fish and pat dry with a paper towel. Don’t skip this step it is insanely important. Cover the skinless side with the paste—if your filet is skinless, only cover one side. Heat a skillet on medium high with roughly 2 T of olive oil, careful not to take the oil to smoke point. Sear the fish skin side down for 4 minutes then cover the pan, turning the heat down to medium. Depending on the thickness of your fish—like with a branzino, or grouper—you should be able to finish the fish in the pan in only a few minutes. However, if you have a sea bass (toothfish) you will need to finish it off in the oven. This usually takes about 6-8 minutes at 400.

While the fish is cooking, toss together the salad.

White Bean salad with Pickled Red Onion* in Lemon Vinaigrette

You can use canned beans or dry for this recipe, but I do prefer dried—they give the dish a bit more snap. If you choose dried, I like to prepare the beans ahead of time to let them chill. If you prefer canned, be sure to drain and rinse them well.

In your blender, prepare the dressing. Add all at once and whirl up:

3 T extra virgin olive oil

1 T red wine vinegar

zest of 1 lemon

Juice from that same lemon (roughly 2T, add more juice if your lemon is a dud)

1 clove garlic

Slice into equally sized bits:

2 celery ribs

½ hothouse cucumber

1 handful Parsley

Now begin the assembly, placing everything in a large bowl and adding 2 c white beans and tossing with the dressing, salt, pepper and a dash of paprika. Top with your pickled onions and serve with your fish. (Or on its own, this makes a great lunch.)

Mixed Nut Baklava

This one takes some doing, honestly. But it is kinda fun and the results are worth it, I think. Give yourself some extra time for the assembly, and trust me on the scissors. If you try to do this with a knife it will be a massive pain in the ass.

Thaw a full package of phyllo dough. Both rolls. You will have some left over, and if you cut carefully you will find that there is enough dough left over to refreeze and get a good pot pie out of. Trust me.

Get out a 9 inch round pan to use as your template. Roll out the dough and position the pan as close to the edges of the dough as you can. Trace the circle with the tip of a knife—just enough to see where you are going. Set the knife aside and use your kitchen scissors to cut the dough into a circle. You can do all the leaves of phyllo at once. The scissors will make it, I promise. Trim off the rest of the dough into a straight rectangle and save the little points left over from cutting out your circle. Cover the dough with a towel as you prepare the rest.

In the food processor, grind to fine (but not dusty):

1 ½ c walnuts

1 ½ c pistachio

1 t lemon zest

Melt 2 sticks of butter and get out a pastry brush. Lay out a piece of parchment paper on a baking sheet and begin. Lay out one piece of dough, brush with butter and cover with another piece of dough. Repeat this process until you have built 10 leaves up. Then add a layer of nuts about 1/4-1/2 inch thick. Drizzle lightly with butter and cover with dough. Begin the dough/ butter process again until you have built up 5 leaves of dough. Do the nut thing. Then the butter thing, then the dough thing. Repeat this process until you are out of nuts, or until you only have 10 leaves of round dough left. This last bit of dough/ butter is your top so you want it to be thicker than the central layers.

Now the fun begins. With your excess dough cut out about 10 layers into 2 inch circles for the big eyes. Cut 10 more layers into 1 inch circles for the pupils. And then cut 10 layers into rounded diamond shapes for the wings, using the pan and the pastry itself as a shaping template. Use the scissors so you can get a nice trimming. Nip off the rounded edges of the leftover points to give yourself a cute triangle for the beak.

Layer and butter the pieces into place to make your owl face and wings. Then, using a very sharp and short knife, cut small diamond shapes into the wings, making certain to go as far down into the pastry as you can, but try not to slice the bottom. Cut around the eyes, the pupils and the beak. You want these slices to be able to funnel the syrup down into the body of the pastry.

Bake on the center rack of a preheated oven at 325 for 60 minutes or until toasty and golden. While the baklava is baking, prepare the syrup.

In a pot heat over medium until thickened and golden:

1 c sugar

2 T lemon juice, or juice of 1 lemon

3/4 cup white wine

1/2 cup honey

1 cinnamon stick

4 whole cloves

1 cardamom pod

Transfer the syrup to a jar or a small pitcher. Allow it to chill in the refrigerator until the pastry is done. After removing the owl, pour the chilled syrup over the hot pastry in stages. You want each pour of syrup to absorb before adding more. Let the pastry chill and set overnight.

Athena Prep List & Sequence

Day before:

Prepare entirety of Baklava

Pressure cook and chill dried beans

Make yoghurt *(deep scratch only)

Pickle red onions

Day of (in order):

Prepare bread through to head of first rise

Chop chop

Prepare bread for second rise

Assemble bean salad

Make vinaigrette

Prep/ dress bass and chill

Bake bread at 425

Whip feta dip

Assemble olives and plate dip

Cook fish

**the timing of the fish finishing should align with the completion of the bread. Adjust as needed to compensate for your fish thickness.

Athena Shopping List

Fresh:

milk

butter lb

feta

yoghurt

sesame seeds

za’atar

sumac *optional

oregano

parsley

cinnamon sticks

cloves

cardamom

whole mustard

lemons x3

garlic

celery

red onion

cucumber

walnuts

pistachios

bass ½ lb per person

filo dough

From your dry pantry:

flour

semolina

salt

sugar

yeast

olive oil

red wine vinegar

honey